Some of my friends

[starbright9]

Well basically I have a bit of a problem, and I can't talk to any of my friends at school because they think it's hilarious. What happens is that some of my friends, Miss G and Miss H, take my stuff at lunch time and during break time. They usually take either my water bottle or umbrella at least once a day. This REALLy annoys me. I get really cross and try and get my stuff back. Some of my friends are nice and try and get my stuff back, normally one of said nice friends (Miss B, Miss N and Mr Go) get my stuff back and give it back to me in next lesson. The thing is, my stuff is getting rather bashed and they won't stop because they think my reaction is funny. What do you think I should do?

[stargazer]

Well, Hmmmmmm, Maybe you should try to talk to them in a civil manner, telling them it's enough, and it's really not that funny to have your stuff stolen. Maybe remind them of a time when someone stole there belongings, and tell them to see how frustrating or tiresome it is to track them down. If you can't then maybe tell them to think of a time when they were stolen from, and maybe have them think how unpleasant it was. Oh, Well, just a question, what led up to this? Were you over reacting to a stealing case? Were reacting to some thief on the news? Were you talking about stealing in anyway?

[Gifted]

I know how you feel! I have a roller packback along with a binder. I carry the binder because very often I don't have enough room in my backpack and I find it frustrating to shove it in, walk a bit, and take it out just a few minutes later. But since my binder's out and I usually have pictures on it, people find it fun to look at it. Also, it has alot of folders and people wanna see what's in them (haven't they ever heard of organizing one's schoolwork?).

It has happened on several ocassions where people pull it to see it or open when I'm away for a while. Course, the ones with sense ask and I'm glad of that, but rude ones just take it. I always get it back of course because no one wants to steal a binder, but I get the really annoying people.

Anyway, continuing on about what to do. At my last table in Science, I had this really annoying boy who kept trying to steal whatever I had on the table including my binder. The first instance happened to be with my pencil. I was really mad because I couldn't find it and it was my best pencil. I searched for it the whole class and finally at the end he gave it back. For heaven's sake, he could have asked to borrow it! What's worse, he has a stupid pencil sharpener that ruins the pencil and I wasn't able to use it to it's full quality for at least a week.

This continued on along with my binder, whichever book I would have, and my re-admits whenever I would be absent the day before. It would take forever for him to admit he had stolen it, even if I had seen him and my item would be in really bad condition (for example, my pencil, one of my books had a chapter's pages fall out, and my re-admit was really wrinkled). He would always pretendingly joke by walking out of the classroom and walking away with it that the other boy at my table who was my friend would have to get it back for him. I was beyond angry at him and I had had enough.

There are four methods which have worked for me in the past. One. Talking to the person and asking them to stop and explain why that annoys you. Usually, it the person has a brain or a heart, they will stop when they hear how much it bothers you. I'm certain this will help you if you really are friends with them.

Two. Try not putting your things in the open. Put away as many things as you can and items out should be watched constantly. What helps it usually I put some part of my body on it. A small item like your pen or a piece of paper can be placed on the table and your hand touches it. Putting large and items you do not care if they get a little dirty or can get clean later on the floor with your feet on it. A water bottle can be put directly by your arm so when they reach over, you can stop them instantly by grabbing it first. Course, it makes it alot easier to pack everything you can because everyone who are decent respect private space and unless your friends are desparate will not open the bag as long as you keep an eye on it (also it makes a lot of things easier).

Three. Practice acting in the mirror. I know, "what's that going to help with?" is going through your mind. Practice being non-surprised and emotionless with a hint of tiredness. So when they steal, you have no emotion on your face. Heck being a little sacastric (sp?) helps too. Saying, "Oh no. They are stealing my umbrella. How will I ever get along." emotionlessly will really take the fun out of it for them. They may laugh the first time, but after that, they will get bored and stop.

Four. Don't do this unless your REALLY have to. Try all the other things first as you don't usually have to do this. Threat to tattle tell. You really have all the reasons in the world to if this goes on for to long. In fact, you may not need to. What you do is that when they steal from you, tell them you will tell an adult. Repeat why it annoys you and that you have asked them to stop before. They usually get the point and back off. It's worked wonders with me.

I am certain you will not need to do Method 4 if they are your friends. They should be able to sympathize if they are truly your friends. If their only excuse is that it's funny say, "Yeah, it was funny. The first time. You are my friends, but you are taking this way too far." I hope that helps. Tell us how it goes!

[starbright9]

Thanks SO much guys! I'll try what you suggested. Moony, they just started doing it, I'm not sure why. I'll let you know how it goes!

[stargazer]

Okay, hope it's all well.

[stargazer]

so, did it go well?

[starbright9]

Depends... Yesterday I managed to stay calm at first. The thing is they took my entire bag instead of just my water bottle. It ended up on the stage being chucked around by some people who haven't been particularly nice to me in the past. In the end I had to go to my next lesson without it. I explained to my teacher and he was ok with it, my friend who had originally taken it brought it to my classroom and told me that she thought I'd left it in the hall. Now at this I got really mad and yelled at her that I didn't leave it behind. I then felt really bad and got all upset. Fortunately my teacher didn't ask me for a detailed explaination. When I got home I got a phone call from the friend who takes my stuff, she said that she was really sorry and that she only did it for my reaction. She also promised me that she wouldn't do it again. So in the long run, it's all good! Though yesterday wasn't exactly the best.

[stargazer]

Hahaha, cool, at least it's done, yeah, people like to do to me too. Probably more mad and dramatical then you are. So it's really hilarious, and see me blow up. That's why they do it too. Well, some likes to takes some stuff, the things that bugs me the most is when people copy of my stuff, lets, say I have my answers back, or something, they like to just look at it. The other is the talkativeness in classes. I kind of dislike chattering in classes, I really want to learn, so people talk and makes noises on purpose so too see the reaction, which is me blowing up. Not funny at all!

[Gifted]

I'm so happy for you starbright! Of course, I am surprised about it being the whole bag taken, but I am glad about your friend apologizing and promising not doing it again.

[starbright9]

Thanks guys! It really helped what you said!

[stargazer]

No, prob, I know how you feel, too, same type of person, like I said before, so yeah! Just lucky it ended like that!